I thought I was a speedy learner at first, as I sailed through each level of the course, matching words to the pictures they identified, and picking the correct verbs in multiple-choice tests. I pronounced words correctly when prompted and could even write small sentences correctly after hearing them spoken a few times.

Reality finally reared its ugly head, however, when I signed up for live online sessions with instructors. During these sessions, you and the professor can only speak in Spanish, and there are several other students logged on for the course as well. When I did poorly during my first session, I thought it was a fluke, but after being the only student who flat-out did not know the answers in the second session, I knew something was wrong.

I went back to the lessons on level one, and instead of flying through them because I could easily pick the correct answer and wanted to get it right, I thought about the words and sounds, and realized there was more to each course than just a display of words to memorize. The words were carefully arranged so that comparisons could be made between them, teaching the learner patterns and how the language was used. The Spanish language, like the English language, was complicated. I realized I had been approaching it like I was playing a computer game, and I needed to stop looking at it in absolutes, and begin seeing it as it really was, a series of words and sounds that have subtle differences and are used in different ways.

Having spent many years in school learning French, I was also prepared for the possibility that Spanish might have verbs that changed in complicated ways, that there would be accent marks, and gender attached to objects and nouns. You would think this would make it easier to learn, but it did not, as French words soon began fighting with Spanish words in my head. I finally began to learn, however, as I identified my problems, and became aware of some of the words that were causing me confusion. Here are a few of them:

‘Bebe’ means ‘to drink’
‘Bebé’ means ‘a baby’

‘Yo tengo’ means ‘I have’
‘Tengo’ means ‘I have’

‘Nueve’ means ‘nine’
‘Nuevo’ means ‘new’

‘Esta’ means ‘this’
‘Está’ means ‘is’

‘Mañana’ means ‘tomorrow’ and ‘morning’

‘El’ means ‘the’ if the object is masculine
‘Él’means ‘he.’ It’s pronounced ‘el,’ which is the same as ‘elle’ for ‘she’ in French.

‘Hermano’ means ‘brother’
‘Hermana’ means ‘sister’
‘Hermoso’ means ‘lovely’

‘Qué’ means ‘what’
‘Que’ means ‘who’

Even though it is not easy for me to learn to speak Spanish, my lessons are the highlight of my day. Some of my favorite words are:

Boligrafo (pen)
Ferreteria (hardware store)
Juguetes (toys)

I love the language despite my troubles, and am pleased that I am not only learning to speak another language, I am learning about myself, and how I can improve my learning skills and enrich my life. ¡Salud!

As we drove through the Appalachian Mountains from our home in Alexandria, Virginia, to spend Thanksgiving with the family that year, my sister and I could barely contain ourselves with excitement.  I was seven years old, and my sister was six, and we loved the adventurous journeys to Batavia.  This was before highways were built through tunnels in the mountains, which made the drive a long one as we drove up and down steep curvy roads.  My father smoked a pipe and drank coffee from a thermos while driving, and would buy us trinkets when we stopped at souvenir shops along the way.  My mother taught us traveling songs like, “She’ll Be Comin’ ‘round the Mountain When She Comes,” and “What’s Round on the Ends and High in the Middle, Ohio” to name a few.

Batavia was a typical small town in those days, something like Mayberry, you could say.  The village was surrounded by hills, which kept it somewhat isolated in the valley between them, and made for a grand entrance when driving down the hill toward it.  With a population of around 1200, most people lived in large older homes with front porches on streets extending from a main street.  My grandparents lived in such houses, and would walk us to the post office, drug store, grocery store, and other shops on Main Street and proudly announce to the sales clerks who we were.

There were churches, a newspaper, several banks, the county courthouse, and the jail on Main Street as well, where you could hear inmates shouting and whistling through the barred windows as you walked on the sidewalk below.  My grandmothers played bridge, socialized on front porches, and were busy maintaining a respected social standing in the community, which had begun generations before.

Our life in Alexandria was much different from life in Batavia, although we played with neighborhood children and went to school there, we did not have close ties with the community.  Our house was in a large suburban area with many other modern houses that were within walking distance of the school, and nothing more.  Needless to say, when we arrived at my grandmother’s house that Nov., we were greeted with such excitement and enthusiasm, we felt like the most important people on Earth.   Little did I know, I was about to cross paths with another girl, exactly my age, and her sister who were also deeply loved, but whose importance would lead to anything but joy.

On Nov. 24, 1965, the day before Thanksgiving, my mother drove us to the home of my aunt and uncle to spend the day playing with our cousins while she helped my grandparents prepare Thanksgiving dinner.  My cousins lived a few blocks from the center of town in a small subdivision of newer homes.   They were small brick houses with attached garages, and were in sharp contrast to the older charming homes just a few blocks away.

We were excited about spending the day with our cousins since they were our only first cousins, and we rarely saw them.  Kennedy was my sister’s age, and her brother J.B. was a few years younger.  My aunt greeted us at the door, but did not appear to share the excitement we were feeling.  In fact, she was quite upset, and started telling my mother about the horrible events that had just happened across the street.

At around 8:30 that morning, Janet Wolfe, who lived in one of the smallest brick houses across the street from my aunt, had shot and killed her two nieces and herself.  Her nieces, Cynthia Kay Hitt, age seven, and Linda Fay Hitt, age six, had been living with their aunt for two years since their mother died.  Their brother, age 12, had remained at home with their father and grandmother, and their father had recently married a widow with a daughter of her own.

According to the article in the Dec. 2, 1965, edition of the Clermont Sun Newspaper, the girls were going to spend Thanksgiving Day with their father and family, and Mrs. Wolfe was not willing to give them up, even for one day.  She had called her sister Johan, who lived close by, and told her that the girls were crying about having to spend Thanksgiving with their father, and she didn’t know what to do.  Something about the conversation alarmed Johan, and she immediately ran to her sister’s house and heard a series of guns shots as she came up to the door.

Johan broke the glass in the door in the rear of the house to get in, severely cutting her arm, and then found her sister laying dead between two twin beds with a 22 revolver beside her in the girls’ bedroom.  Cynthia and Linda were also dead, lying in the twin beds, dressed in their school clothes, each with a gun shot wound in their head as well.  Johan also found a note in the kitchen that read, “I did it,” signed by Janet Wolfe.

The story upset my mother, and she and my aunt talked about it for quite some time as we children watched.  Kennedy, who had walked to school every day with the girls, said she wasn’t feeling well, and spent the day in bed. My six-year-old sister, four-year-old cousin and I picked up on the aunt’s last name of Wolfe, and spent the rest of the day beating up a large stuffed bear as we pretended to be fighting an evil wolf.

The next day at Thanksgiving, things went well as they normally did.  We sat at the children’s table as my mother and grandfather could be heard laughing above the buzz of conversation of the large group assembled around my grandmother’s dinning room table.  We were excited to be together, all dressed up, enjoying a delicious meal, with little mention of the horrible event that had taken place just a short distance away.

As the days passed and we returned to our home in Virginia, I couldn’t stop thinking about what had happened to Cynthia and Linda.  Two sisters, the exact ages of my sister and myself, who were dressed up and cared for much the same way we were.  I imagined them as their aunt told them to lie down before going to school that morning, and then walked up to each one and shot them in the head.  Did they see her coming?  Did the second victim see her sister being shot and then see her aunt coming for her?  The horror of the event felt like gunshot wounds to my spirit, as the pain and terror jabbed me in quick gut-wrenching emotional thrusts.

The community newspaper in Batavia ran the story on the front page the next week with the headline, “Thanksgiving A Day of Grief in Batavia.”  On the society page, my grandmother had given them a write-up of her Thanksgiving get-together.  She listed her guests with proper titles, Mr. and Mrs. and children, Col. and Mrs., without identifying them as family members, as if she were leading readers to believe she had important people from across the country coming to join her at her home.

As the years passed, I didn’t think much about our family Thanksgiving get-togethers in Batavia, as my memories faded into a vague recollection of events.  I can’t say the same for the memory of what happened to Cynthia and Linda Hitt, however.  To this day I feel horrified as I clearly imagine two young girls lying dead in their beds with gun shot wounds to their heads.

Source: The Clermont Sun Newspaper, Dec. 2, 1965, copied from microfilm at Batavia, Ohio, branch of the Clermont County Public Library.

Copyright Kathleen Pfeiffer.  Contact the author to obtain permission for republication.

Improved Techniques That Help You Sleep

According to WebMD, you should go to bed at a regular bedtime every night, and wake up at the same time each day. This sounds logical, but we all know life is full of unexpected events that can make a regular sleeping routine impossible. Tracy Rupp of the Walter Reed Army Institute of Research was part of a new study on banking sleep which found that getting more sleep at times was more helpful later to those who were denied sleep than those who slept the same amount each night. She explains that those who stored sleep when time permitted were “more resilient during the time when sleep was restricted.”

Setting aside time for problem solving earlier in the day so that you don’t carry anxious thoughts to bed, is a common recommendation that is also suggested by WebMD . They say to keep a notepad by your bed to write down any thoughts or worries that may keep you up or wake you up during the night as well. In an article by Elizabeth Scott, M.S. on About.com, she goes on to say, “Writing in a journal before bed can clear your mind, help you process emotions, solve problems….and can get you in a positive frame of mind for sleep.” Allowing yourself to have a good cry at bedtime is also a good way to relieve pent-up anxiety and allow for a good night’s sleep. Life coach Martha Beck says it’s actually stressful to force yourself to stay happy. She says that giving yourself “permission to feel as we feel, not continuous happiness, is the foundation of well-being,” in her May 2010 column in Oprah Magazine.

WebMD recommends doing something relaxing before bedtime like deep breathing, yoga, meditation, tai chi or muscle relaxing exercises. Dr. Oz, however, advises that if you’re still awake after 15 minutes, you do something to quiet your mind like reading a book, not exercising. In an article by Robert Pendergrast, M.D., he goes on to say that by breathing deep, and “…taking the time to observe your breath, being fully aware of its movement in and out, and bringing the mind’s attention back to the breath as soon as it wanders onto another thought…is very useful for easing into sleep or going back to sleep in the night.”

New Products That Help You Sleep

Using earplugs or sleeping in a different room if your partner’s snoring keeps you awake is another common solution, also suggested by WebMD. They say that if you notice that your partner is sleeping on his or her back, turn your partner to his or her side. This may help your partner stop snoring. You may also want to encourage your partner to see a doctor to find out what may be causing him or her to snore. If this doesn’t work, consumersearch.com recommends Breathe Right Nasal Strips. They studied reviews from BBC News Magazine and SleepEducation.com and found that, “Reviews by users, tests by manufacturers and recommendations by doctors all point to Breathe Right Nasal Strips as the most effective over-the-counter treatment for chronic snoring.”

According to WebMD, reducing the noise in the house, or masking it with a steady low noise, such as a fan on slow speed or a radio tuned to static helps with sleeping.  Another way to create white noise while cleaning a room of allergens is by using a portable air-cleaning machine. Lowes sells affordable Idylis room air cleaners for different sized rooms, and they’re easy to clean and use.  Wearing earplugs at night is another effective way to reduce distracting noise, and can be comfortably used for long periods of time.  One problem with the long term use of earplugs is that they tend to cause wax to get impacted deep in the ear. Dr. Go, an eye, ear, nose and throat specialist from Cincinnati, Ohio, explains that this also happens to people who wear hearing aids, and that having the wax removed once a year by an ear specialist takes care of the problem.

Keeping the room cool and dark is also recommended by professionals. WebMD says that if you can’t darken the room, use a sleep mask. Pilot Paul, a frequent user of sleep masks, gives an excellent review of different quality sleep masks on his website, but he prefers sleeping in a darkened room whenever possible. One easy way to darken a room is to install products like Blackout EZ Window Covers, that are simply blackout vinyl material you can cut to fit any window.  They are inexpensive, easy to order, and come with velcro attachment material.  To keep a room cool enough to help with sleep, H. Craig Heller, PhD, professor of biology at Stanford University says it should be between 65 and 72 degrees. It helps to have a battery operated room thermometer in the room to help monitor the temperature.

Dr. Oz lists taking medications as a way to help you sleep as well. He goes on to say, “Benadryl or one of the combination OTC painkillers or sleep drugs can give you that little nudge into natural sleep.” A review of these products showed that everything from Ambien to Tylenol PM had side effects that made them difficult to use in the long run. Reviews of Ambien showed many people walked in their sleep or were dizzy and tired the next day. Most over-the-counter sleep aids contain antihistamines that caused nervousness, dizziness and sleeplessness for many users. Be sure to check any prescribed medications that you may be taking to see if sleeplessness is one of the side effects. It may be possible to change to another medication that does not interfere with sleep.

So there you have it, by taking the time to prepare yourself for bed with a cool, dark room, a calm state of mind, and the right products, the average person now has a better chance of sleeping well and tackling the challenges of the day ahead. Sweet dreams, folks!

The book begins as Mr. Neyra’s describes his carefree life in Cuba as a child.  Being a member of a prominent family, Mr. Neyra was well-loved, cared for, and indulged by various family members.  This love and concern, however, is what also leads to the separation from his beloved family when they send him, his sister and cousin to the United States to avoid communist indoctrination.  He and his sister end up living with family friends in Cincinnati, where he excels in school, becomes a wealthy businessman, and raises a strong family of his own.

The most interesting parts of the story are the vivid descriptions of the places in Cuba where Mr. Neyra lived as a child as they were at the time of his childhood, and as they were when he returned on numerous trips beginning about 40 years later.  In an effort to regain the feeling of belonging he lost as a child, he traces his family lineage in Cuba and uncovers some surprises, and later finds he is the descendent of a King while exploring his ancestry in Spain.

Although his story of facing and overcoming childhood traumas is a common story, what makes his account so special is the unusual setting and clarity, humor, courage, and overall success of the character.  One cannot read ‘Cuba, Lost and Found’ without becoming more courageous, honest and hopeful about one’s life.  It may be a story about a boy who was forced to grow up too fast because of political instability, but it’s also about hope in the human condition.  His story reminds us that the small voice within us, often frightened and overlooked, is the voice that can ultimately heal us, allowing us to live fully and make our dreams come true.

A story that will seduce and captivate you like Havana itself.  Strap yourself in, my friends, maracas, Mojitos, and the cha-cha-cha are calling your name.  With a spin of the roulette wheel, it begins:

‘Sure, the tourists and sailors packed the Tropicana and Sans Souci nightclubs like rats on a sinking ship.  They scrambled, eyes wide with desperation as they crowded the dance floor and gawked at the shows.  They had finally found the one place on earth where they could experience pure joy.  No worries here, it would seem.  They were a world away from home, for God’s sake, in a place where the forbidden was put on display and offered up on a silver platter to those brave enough to partake.  Why, I wondered, was it necessary to be in danger to experience pleasure?  It would make sense that pleasure should have nothing to do with fear or danger, but the truth is they cannot exist without each other, and in no place was this more obvious and attainable then right now, right here in Havana.’ – Havana Mystery

Havana Mystery is more than a fictional novella; it is based on real events, and provides the full picture of Cuba in the 1950′s, depicting tourism, crime, and the heart-wrenching things Castro was beginning to do to the Cuban people.   Now available in paperback from lulu.com.

Color postcards of Havana circa 1929, ‘Souvenir of Cuba’ postcard circa 1949, photo of Naval Officers and gal in club in Havana circa 1949.  From collection of Kathleen Pfeiffer.

It is written in a fast, yet detailed pace that makes it impossible to put down.  The perfect mystery for a quiet read poolside or fireside.

Easy download for the Nook, iPad, iPod, or laptop. Just $1.99 from lulu.com.

As for style, my husband and I operate in opposite styles. I fly by the seat of my pants, and he does everything by the book. This works in our favor most of the time. On vacations, for example, he researches extensively before leaving, so he knows exactly where we are at all times, not only in relation to our destination, but in relation to the sun, the moon, and the planets. I, on the other hand, rarely have any idea where I am, and, if left to my own devices, would spend a significant amount of time being lost. His ways help our trips run smoother, and my ways loosen things up and leave room for spontaneous discoveries.

Things don’t always work in our favor. During our trip to New York City, for instance, sparks flew when he refused to take my picture in the lobby of a Broadway theater because there was a sign that said, “No Photos Allowed Inside Theater.”

Our well-oiled machine came to grinding halt again recently when we began preparing our income tax return. Normally Greg does the taxes by himself, crossing every “T” and dotting every “I,” and I happily leave the job to him. Last year, however, he made a $2000 mistake, so we decided that we would do them together this year. Having worked as a bookkeeper for 15 years, I am good with numbers and familiar with taxes, so we thought it would help.

It started in an orderly fashion, but when I insisted that my freelance deductions be entered into categories that did not exist, things began to deteriorate rapidly. Suddenly, he was shouting, “we are not going to deduct that, there’s no category for it, and I do not want to go to jail!” And I was shouting, “what’s the worst that can happen? You’re not going to go to jail!”

After each one of us had our turn at stomping out of the room, he said he found a category that would probably work, and the deduction was entered. That evening on our way to dinner, he calmly commented that he was relieved that we had finished doing the taxes. He had been dreading it for weeks, knowing I would certainly expect him to risk going to jail at some point. We had a good hard laugh, and went on our way.

It later occurred to me that the secret to our success is most likely our differences. I was confident once again that we were a good match, not because we were the same, but because we fit together.  Like opposite spokes on a wheel, we meet in the middle, and the machine moves on as we help each other tackle challenges, and to go places we could never get to alone.

Lisbeth Salander, the heroine in all three stories, brings a new character to the literary scene.  She first appears to be a hardened soul, criminal, in fact, as she relives killing her father and then graphically fights off a sexual abuser.  You soon learn that she is extremely intelligent and committed to researching crimes far beyond the norm, and then using the information to personally see that justice is done.  Even though she has suffered physical and sexual abuse since she was a child, she faces violence and abuse as an adult head-on as she fearlessly takes down the offenders in her own highly effective way.  It is refreshing to get to know a female character who uses her anger to quietly take decisive action.  You wonder, however, if someone so independent and seemingly void of emotion is capable of finding love, or even wants it, for that matter?  An embattled journalist is willing to give it a try.

Journalist Mikael Blomkvist is somewhat of a love interest for Lisbeth in the three stories, unlikely as it may be.  He is middle-aged and down on his luck, but like Lisbeth, he is driven to uncover some dangerous criminal situations which put his life in harms way.  After she initiates a sexual encounter, he finds the odd looking, quiet girl irresistible.

We love Lisbeth because she not only kicks the hornet’s nest, she smacks the venom right out of them, and, like her recently deceased creator, Stieg Larsson, she seeks no glory.  He writes from the heart, and we are lucky to go along for the ride.

If you prefer watching movies to reading, I highly recommend ordering the Swedish versions of the stories with subtitles.  Although American versions of the stories are in the works, hearing the Swedish language and seeing the gritty style of the movie makes it more realistic and enthralling.  The books and movies can be ordered from Amazon.com here.

To learn about new library services, read “The London Public Library: An Example of the New Mega-Library.”

I had the opportunity to experience this recently when I had a vivid dream after days of wondering just what I should be doing with my free time.  I am an empty-nester who was recently laid off from work which gave me time to do everything from home-improvement projects to writing the novel I have always wanted to write, to learning Spanish, to taking a job just to have a job…you get the picture.

I went to bed after wresting with what to do, and by morning I had my answer.  I had a dream where I was arguing with Dr. House on TV, and he shouted at me angrily, “what are you doing?”  I shouted back, “I’m a writer, bubba!”  He then shouted, “then challenge me.”  I thought about it all morning and realized I wanted to start writing ASAP.  I had heard of a website that posted freelance written articles that I had wanted to try at one point, so I went there and applied as a freelance writer.  They accepted me and I began writing, and have written an article every week for several months now, and I LOVE it!

I’m not sure if my dream was a prediction of my future or the voice of my subconscious guiding to my pure heart’s desire, but I know I take my dreams much more seriously now.  In Dr. Dossey’s book, he describes numerous dreams people had that turned out to be predictions of actual events like the events on 9/11/01.  He also documents the many times that, because someone took their dreams seriously, lives were saved.  It is a fascinating look at research and experiments that support the possibility of premonitions, and how you can make your life more premonition-prone.

For more information on dreams and intuition, read “How to Use Your Dreams and Intuition to Improve Your Life.”